I thought America was already great. It turns out that I was in the minority. As I sit here, watching the voting results come in, pushing Trump closer to electoral college victory, I can’t even cry. I want to, and the tears are there, fighting their way to my eyeballs. I’m angry. And devastated. And sad. And sick. I feel hopeless, in a world where not enough hope exists.
What comes next? No one knows. The market is already tanking. Everything good I believe in is about to be uprooted, or so it seems. And I feel hate in my heart for those who voted for him. I don’t like this feeling. They might have felt the same way towards me if Hillary was winning. But they don’t have to, because people just couldn’t stomach a female president and democratic principles.
How do I heal myself so I can gear up for the fight to protect the disadvantaged groups put most at risk by a Trump presidency?
I’m not sure, but I’m going to sleep on it, and start tomorrow afresh. Because I plan to do my best to be an ally to those groups Trump has hated on throughout this election season – women, people of color, immigrants and refugees, LGBTQI+, the poor, the disabled, and anyone else I left out (it’s late, I’m tired, and the baby will wake me up to nurse before I know it.)
But first, prayer. I’m not the best or most consistent at prayer, but I’m a work in progress. The first verses that came to mind are The Beatitudes found in Matthew 5, verses 1-12:
5 When Jesus[a] saw the crowds, he went up the mountain; and after he sat down, his disciples came to him. 2 Then he began to speak, and taught them, saying:
3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
5 “Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.
6 “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.
7 “Blessed are the merciful, for they will receive mercy.
8 “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
9 “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.
10 “Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11 “Blessed are you when people revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely[b] on my account. 12 Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
Amen. And now I’m crying. And still feeling sick and devastated.