Yesterday I witnessed a beautiful sunrise over the marsh as I drove south to reconnect with best friends who I don’t get to see as often as I like. The sky turned from dark purple to light grey to a sudden burst of light with pink, orange, and bright blue hues. The morning fog swirled around trees felled by Hurricane Irma or maybe just strong summertime storms. I had Christmas music blaring on the radio and I felt it: peace. The stillness within the chaos of everything happening in my world these days. I’ve been working at noticing the happy and beautiful things in my life, and was able to be in, and appreciate, that moment. And it felt wonderful.
That moment was fleeting, however, as my mind drifted away from peace toward events occurring over the past week that have been troubling me. Tax reform that only benefits the wealthy and corporations and harms the poor and middle class. Provisions in this tax bill harming Puerto Ricans by applying a 20% excise tax to payments made by companies on the mainland to their subsidiary businesses in PR. The movement to destroy net neutrality and change the way information is disseminated. Climate change that is definitely happening and leaving polar bears without ice for their homes. A lack of moral leadership in Washington on both sides of the aisle (Presidents Trump and Clinton, Senator Franken, and more).
And then I worshiped at my parents’ church this Sunday morning, the first Sunday of Advent, hoping to hear the good news found in this period of waiting for Jesus’ birth.
The Gospel lesson from Mark 13: 24-37 tells us to keep awake, and not to lose hope. Even in the midst of an apocalyptic, bleak-looking world with great loss and suffering, we know that God brings new things out of the old. It’s the story of the Resurrection. He brings light out of the darkness and a new hope with it. We simply have to watch and keep awake.
But it seems so damn hard these days to stay awake. The disciples had issues staying awake for only an hour when Jesus asked them, and they knew Jesus in real life! We are living in a world with a loss of values and perversion of power, and I feel full of rage and despair often. I’m not alone in feeling this way, but that doesn’t make the world better. And the world, especially the United States that I love, needs to do better.
Pastor Goyer repeatedly told us that the end times aren’t here quite yet. In reality, it is the old order of power and politics (white male hegemony) that is on the way out in favor of our whole community sharing power. Everyone. I love the sound of that. It needs to be our reality.
In the meantime, the dark time, I still need to look for the signs of Jesus turning out the old and reforming it into something entirely new. I need to be fully alert and watching for the billions of ways he comes into my life. I’m awake, and doing my best not to lose hope. The light is coming. It’s the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine?
Not yet, but I’m keeping watch and staying awake so I can. I hope.